14. In memory of Judah Blaze Horvath

In memory of our sweet baby boy, I wanted to share the letter that Kasey and I wrote and read at Judah's funeral service.

Our sweet baby boy,

In naming you Judah we desired to honor our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Your namesake is a reference to the lineage of Christ and we believe that your legacy will forever bring glory to His great name. Choosing to name you Blaze rightfully captured the nature of your time spent in our arms here on earth. You did not come into this world as a smoldering wick or slight spark, but instead you existed as a blazing fire; consuming our emotions, affections, and love.

As we wait for the perfect to be revealed, we are restricted by dim vision in this momentary life. We do not fully know why God chose to only give you to us for such a short time, but even in our limited understanding we do know this:

Son, you have been a tool in the hand of your creator and an instrument of instruction to your parents. God, in his sovereign and predetermined will, chose to shape and mold your momma and daddy, through your life, long before the foundations of the world were ever laid.

Judah, it is your life that has heightened our understanding of the cross. As we beheld the precious face of our one and only son, we realized that we could never do anything to harm or hurt you. However, as we consider the cross, we realize that God, in his great mercy, was pleased to crush his one and only son, as justice and payment for sins committed by rebellious people. This reality, of God’s love for sinners, like your momma and daddy, has wrecked us anew and ruined us both afresh. We stand amazed at the suffering of Christ on our behalf.

Your life has also brightened our understanding of unconditional love. Even before you were born, your momma and daddy loved you for who you were– you had not done anything good or bad, wrong our right –  our love for you was truly unmerited, you existed and we loved you.  Yet, however pure or untainted this love seems, we know that it is imperfect, because we ourselves are imperfect, having been tainted by sin. Our love is deficient, compared to God’s unconditional and unmerited love. Understanding our flawed expressions of love, in light of God’s perfect love, has caused us to cherish and prize his unmerited love – Grace.

Judah, you have stirred in our hearts a greater desire for the return of our Lord – it is your life that causes us to emphatically say “come Lord Jesus come” and deliver us from this present world of sin, sorrow, and suffering.  We long for the second appearing of our Savior and King, Jesus Christ.  We earnestly wait for the day when creation will be fully redeemed and restored—when Satan and all of our Lord’s foes will be dealt their final blows. Even more than this, we long to be eternally in the physical presence of our God.

These are just some of the things that God has already taught us through your precious life. We know there is more to learn and more to come – God is not finished forming us through your life just yet.

Our sweet, sweet boy we love you so very much and thank God that he chose to give you to us. Judah Blaze, you will forever be fixed in our hearts consuming our love and affection.

Love,

Mommy and Daddy

By His Grace,